(Painting by: Ken Valastro)
Personally i see rejection as painful, and in many cases there really is no true survival of it, because in many ways a piece of the heart dies from it.
But the deepest rejection is not the kind that falls from his lovers lips and it's not even the shove or push away in a bout of anger or pain.
No i believe that the most painful rejection is the kind that life gives. Because it is the circumstances of life that play a part in whether your love will flourish or your love will die.
In one moment all the earth will be blooming with spring in congratulatory celebration of your new found love.
The sun would shine bright and even the rain sounded soft and peaceful in its melody as it fell to the earth in sweet surrender.
The smell of earth overtook your senses as it wafted through the grass and dirt into the breezy sky
You don't notice the lightning or even hear the thunder because it was such a beautiful spring
the birds were out and you were joyously happy
For the first time, this new found love could not be contained and as a couple you were truly happy.
But then in a blink of an eye life decided to change its mood. its desire was to tear you apart. and so the storms really bore down and circumstance decided to play its cruel intentions and manipulations upon the loving duo.
and like a disease, it set things into motion.
the love though not dead had surely been torn asunder
what can you do when life itself rejects your happiness?
All you can truly do is get angry, but in the end that anger is no justification for your being wronged.
through it you can never truly find retribution.
No, that kind of rejection leaves you feeling empty and barren
Because what was once a garden flourishing with color and vibrancy
Through the years has slowly turned into a forsaken graveyard of memories.
They are cherished deeply but still to painful to keep up and so on the wayside of your mind it remains
and on the wayside they slowly began to fade
years passed and her presence was missed.
regrets no longer steal his peace in the night, yet insomnia still remains his friend
she whom he loved still gone, separated by time and space
He slowly comes back to reality and away from his far away state
After being still in one position for so long
with his aged back, he rises stiffly
suppressing the long and aching memories of the past from his mind by taking a deep breath of air into his raspy lungs
stashing them away in his heart he headed for the door with his briefcase in his hand and an umbrella ready
and just as he expected the millions of springs from the past poured down on him as the drizzling shower started to come down on his yellow umbrella
with a heavy heart he headed home
this spring was no different... just like every spring since his love he continually remembered her.
The weather was perfect for their melancholy mood, with the grey backdrop and drizzling rain
The city was slow and the cars were constant
He headed for the crosswalk to cross the street
unknowingly she walked in his direction parallel to where he walked
within seconds they would meet at the crossroads
and as the light turned green they would cross the crosswalk and head directly into each other
moments passed as the cosmos allowed another reunion,
the faint steps of their shoes hitting cement meant nothing to them as they continued on
Because it had been so long, their bodies were no longer young
they did not recognize each other
yellow umbrella faced yellow umbrella
like strangers in both heart and body they pass without knowing each other
even the grazing contact of their shoulders in passing was not enough to awaken what once was
1 second, 2 seconds, 3 seconds pass and a memory blooms out of the ever decayed and forsaken moments kept deep and away in his mind
was it her scent? Her eyes? her smile? the way she walked? or simply the reality of what once was intermingling with the present reality with factors of circumstance?
Is he ever able to forget her? Is he even allowed to?
The skin may age but the heart has no limit on time when concerning its love for another
His punishment in life is holding her only in his memory and keeping it alive forever.
Without the warm touch the memory may turn cold and what warmth can come from "What if's?" or "What may have been's?"
But regardless of his punishment, he knew her
Turning quickly to catch another glance
the rain poured down with heavy abandon and in dismal solitude he searched for her yellow umbrella only to find a moment in life forever gone
and with the rain all hope of seeing her washed away as he slowly made his way home
Love
Can love and happy endings truly be worth cherishing if it was only for a time?
was that love in vain?
He asks himself this question everyday
and yet deep within his soul he still holds her dear to his heart
loving and cherishing her memory until the day he passes from this life
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